Newly diagnosed PTSD

[Kristal]

Hi there, firstly thank you for having this forum, and thanks to everyone contributing.

i am an ex psych nurse, recently diagnosed with complex PTSD, I have really been struggling with day to day life- not been working for almost 2 years- horrid vaccine injury( a whole other story), but basically despite regular engagement with psychiatrist and psychologist- I am very isolated.

since loosing my job I became homeless for a period of time lived in a vehicle, then a shelter for domestic violence and now am thankfully in community housing.

 One would think- problem solved , right?

not to be ungrateful- because I am very grateful- but my mental health despite treatment and attempts at medication recovery seems to evade me.

I feel more “crazy” than ever - I have no social interaction or suppprt only my one son who is an adult and close by- but I’m mindful how much what I have been thru has affected him- 

I have applied for a support worker but the wait list is extensive and I still have not been allocated a support worker.

i feel bleak and helpless- despite my own knowledge as a psych nurse- severe grief and loss since my father passed away 2022- was the beginning of my downfall as I nursed him for the last three years before he passed.  I can’t return to work I am on disability I can’t connect with anyone and I have no friends family or inclination to engage due to severe depression and anxiety and my appearance dramatically changed post Covid vaccine injury( lost my hair and still hasn’t grown back)

I feel alone and sad and have nightmares constantly- I can’t see a way forward counselling hasn’t helped.

is anyone out there getting relief with PTSD what helps you please.

thanks for reading sorry I know how depressed I sound- it’s just where I am at I can’t seem to shake it at all

[RiverSeal]

Hey @Kristal, thank you for joining the Forums and sharing your experiences with the community!

It sounds like you have been through a lot with your MH and vaccine injury. You are demonstrating your strength and resilience reaching out and sharing your story with your peers. It can be hard to be vulnerable with a new community and you are showing how brave you are in your post.

I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your father in 2022 and it must have been challenging to look after him while he was unwell. 

Please stay connected with the community and keep sharing your story with your peers!

Take care

RiverSeal 

[MJG017]

Hi @Kristal, welcome to the forum.  I wish I had any advice to offer you.  It must have be so extremely difficult the past few years.  You've reached out here and shared your story and hopefully that helps you but I would just continue to reach out to whoever you can, get as much support as you can and start to build a bit of a network around you.  Maybe things like support groups, or oven calling one of the crisis support lines to get as much help and advice as possible.

I understand being hesitant about reaching out too much to your son, I'm much the same with my partner, who is my only support.  I've put her through a lot the past couple of years with my mental and physical health and I really do try not to add any more than I absolutely have to.  But it helps just to talk and spend time with her, even if it's just nothing to do my my problems.  So maybe just talk to your son, even if it's just to see how he's doing, see what's been happening with him... just to hear his voice and have a bit of human contact.  Then take things from there.  You may find his worrying about you is far more of a strain on him, than being able to support you however he can.

[Kristal]

Thank you very much for your reply- I appreciate it immensely.

 I will take ur advice on talking to my son about other things and it’s so important to still connect instead of letting distance seperate us.

i hope ur also healing and wish u a great day ahead.

thank you 

[Kristal]

Thank you so much for ur reply. I’m learning to navigate this forum still- glad it’s here tho