I can’t cope

[Jynx]

@Captain24 gotcha! And I'm with @tyme - keep going! You may not be able to see your progress as clearly as we can (lord knows I was pretty blind to my own recovery process, and struggled to believe others when they commented on it!), but I promise you that it's there, it's happening! You got this 😁💪

I'm off for tonight! Good to chat to ya hun, catch you next time 💜

[Captain24]

Thanks @Jynx. Talk soon

[Captain24]

I can see some progress but it’s just not enough @Jynx @tyme. I’m not sure I will ever be able to limit that voice. 

I wish I had the confidence that you guys do that I will make it to the other side. 

[tyme]

Actually, @Captain24 ,

I was on the OTHER side only not too long ago. I never thought I'd get over to the side I'm on now.

I'm sure I've told you many times, that I don't have anything 'special' about me to get me to where I am now. 

I feel you have so much more understanding and ability that what I had back then. I think this is why I'm hopeful for you. 

[Captain24]

I see you as ‘special’ @tyme. You have managed to pull yourself out of that really deep dark hole you were once in and have been able to turn your life around to be able to help others.

You have a really beautiful and kind heart. That shows by helping that guy in your other house. I’m sure there is so much stuff you have done. 

I am trying and I’m trying to learn. I’ve willingly decided to go back to hospital to extend from my last visit. Plus they are looking at doing another stage. I’ll do that too. I’m going to all my appointments. I haven’t missed one in over 2 years. So I really am trying. It just seems like I just can’t break it. 

[tyme]

I'm an ordinary person with MH issues @Captain24 

I believe in you. I know how much you are trying. 

Please don't ever let go. 

I don't want that dream I had... it just shows how much I'm thinking about you, even subconsciously in my sleep. I haven't had a dream I've remembered since then. And I haven't remembered a dream in ages.... 

[Snowie]

Morning @Captain24 

Hoping work goes well and fast for you.

Take care 💕💕

[Captain24]

Hi @Snowie 

I hope you are feeling better today than yesterday. 

I have finished work. I’m allowed to leave early now instead of sitting around. 

I told mum I don’t finish until 4 but I’m already home. It’s just nice to be alone for a bit.

Apparently Pix has hurt her foot and is limping really badly. Mum is trying to get her into the vet. It’s pointless me taking her as I wasn’t with her when it happened. 

[Captain24]

I am trying to hang in @tyme sometimes it all feels too hard. 

I often think of that dream. I currently am not in that level of distress. Dreams mean something but I don’t know how to interpret them. There must be something behind it for you to remember. 

It does mean something though to know that you think of me. It shows how much you really do care not because it’s your job.

I hope today is treating you well

[tyme]

Heya @Captain24 ,

100%, this is not just a job. It means so much more to me that 'just a job'. 

It's seems to be incredibly cold today. The wind and cold is biting.

I'm going to send you an email shortly.