Lived Experience Forum

[Pem]

Hi, 

I'm super new to this..but just really need someone (or something) to chat to. 

I recently went through a breakup with a guy I had been with for 2 years. He found someone else. And my mum has recently been diagnosed with cancer. 

Both news has been in the last 2 weeks. I'm a mental mess. Crying every night and feeling super alone. 

Just needing some to talk to. 

Sorry for complaining 

[StanD]

Hi @Pem ,

I am sorry for the huge struggles you are dealing right now. It hurts my heart to know what it must be like for you. I imagine you are feeling genuinely isolated within your confusion & grief.

These are big shocks to deal with. And both at the same time. I am sorry.

You have been brave to share on here & ask for support. There are many kind people here to help you through this time.

I am thinking you perhaps might need professional supports too? This is lots to deal with & it is no surprise you are feeling broken & crying all the time.

Maybe @tyme or one of the peer support workers can direct you, in accessing professional supports?

Please don't ever be sorry for complaining. (And you are not - imo, you are expressing, sadness, grief, confusion, shock - lots of mixed, & big emotions)

I'm so glad you made the step to reach out here, & trust this community enough to be brave & share.

All of us need support. Life is not always easy. If you need to express, please feel free to say whatever you need.

I'm sure you will get better, & maybe more practical replies from members in the morning.

I am sorry for your grief. I can imagine, this is a time, when you could have needed your partner most. I think this indicates, that they are not good enough for you, & ultimately you will be better & stronger without them. 

I don't know anything about your mum's diagnosis, however, people beat this awful disease all the time.

I personally would not know how to react to such news. I don't want to pretend that staying positive, is the answer. I am, however, proud, of you for taking time to be brave & share with forums what is happening for you.

I understand this is difficult time for you, &:I am sorry you are going through this.

I am sorry, I am not a professional - I don't know correct things to say - I am only another member, with lots of problems.

... So I hope my reply is appropriate, &:I know, better equipped ppl will reply to you soon.

I think it's ok to cry. I would be crying too.

(And I do -  often)

I honestly don't how what to say.

Thankyu 

For sharing.

[StanD]

@tyme  @hanami @Jynx 

[Parzival]

Hi @Pem, life feels overwhelming right now and that’s valid. Breakups can be traumatic, I’m still grieving a long term relationship that in December. I see that you’re hurting, I can relate to the pain of such loss. Please look after yourself, it’s okay to cry, your body is mourning too.

I’m so sorry to hear about your mother, the news only adds to your heartbreak. Right now support is something you’re in need of, and I hope that your family and friends can be there for you during such a hard time. You are strong, take things one day at a time.

I understand being all over the place, it leaves you exhausted and feeling fragile which are both valid emotions. Greifline offers support that may help manage some of your stress when you feel on edge about everything. Take care

[8ppleTree]

Hi @Pem 

Welcome to the forums. You are talking to real people 👍 

That's certainly not great news, and not good timing. Really sorry to hear you've been crying 😞 You don't need to apologise at all, that's a lot of change and uncertainty to process! These are foundational shocks, and can take a bit of time re-stabilising yourself.

Are you eating, sleeping and getting through all your basics? Having a bit of extra support as you go through this could be helpful. You can also call the SANE Support line at any time on 1800 187 263.

What other things, ie practices/ppl do you think might be supportive for you?

Wishing you a better day today - 💜

[tyme]

Hey @Pem ,

I'm sorry to hear how hard things have been after your break up. 

You feelings are totally valid. A sense of loss after a breakup is very normal, and grief looks different for everyone. 

Please know you are not alone in this.

We are here for you.

[Asgard]

Hi @Pem 

Read your story and was just checking in on how you are doing.  Hope you have a good supportive network around you and if not, you can always come on here and have a whinge about life if you want to.  Sometimes its just what the body and mind wants.  So yell if you want to, we're always here for you. 🙂

[StanD]

I really love this reply @Asgard 

I hope you are ok @Pem xx

[Asgard]

Hi @Pem 

Haven't heard from ye for a wee bit.  The offer to scream and shout is still there.  Hope things are getting better for you.  🙂