Lived Experience Forum

[meditate]

Hello everyone, this is my first time posting on a mental health forum so I'm hoping to get some general advice and contribute what I can to help others as well. I'm a 25 year old man, living every day with moderate to severe depression. I have social anxiety which keeps me home most of the time, and the times I do go into my office when I'm not working from home, I barely speak to anyone and hate taking public transport.

I have also recently learned about ADHD and ASD, and I think I might fall under that umbrella too, since I've suffered from ADHD and ASD symptoms for my entire life. I don't have any friends as I'm very introverted and antisocial. I don't have a support group, just my girlfriend who has always been very supportive of me. I have complicated relationships with my parents, and nonexistent relationships with my older brother and sister. I don't have any current goals or ambitions, and I feel like my life is pointless sometimes. I have a job that often involves listening to quite distressing audio, and I think I am especially vulnerable to being emotionally drained from work due to my mental health state.

I feel totally overwhelmed by my situation. I often sit or lie down for hours, completely paralysed by depression; I would do this for days or weeks if I didn't need to support myself. I feel like I'm going crazy because I've felt this way for so long. I'm really hoping someone might be able to point me in the right direction, so that I can make sense of my life and get back on track.

[Melbcoffeesnob]

Hello @meditate 

Welcome to the forums, I am glad you found us, and good on you for reaching out.

These forums are a safe and non-judgmental place for you to reach out. This is a really supportive welcoming community free from judgment and I know the forum family will be really eager to wrap their supportive (virtual arms) around you. 

In regards to feeling like you might have ADHD and ASD, I hear that you’ve been doing everything you can to seek support with this and find ways of coping that work for you, which must be very frustrating. The one thing we hope you can lean on at this time is the forum community.

While you’re waiting for a response, I suggest having a look at the different sections of the forums (you can do a forum post search above using the search bar) to see if you’re able to connect with others who may share similar experiences with depression, ADHD and ASD.

Sending kind thoughts,

Melbcoffeesnob

[Resonar]

Hey @meditate,

I want to welcome you and say thanks for sharing!

You're already progressing on the best general advice by looking for help.

I'm a 30 year old male, recently diagnosed with ADHD.

I'll tell you how I ended up diagnosed, and maybe that will give you an option that might work for you or even just some food for thought.

Like yourself, I started by stumbling into some learning about ADHD. I have a fairly close work colleague who happens to be a doctor, and used to be in family practice. I was speaking to him about some difficulties I was having with university, work and interpersonal relationships and in short his reply was "That sounds really similar to ADHD". I initially brushed it off and thought whatever it's probably nothing.

Fast forward about 6-12 months. I found myself struggling with some new problems that I felt I needed some help with, I spoke to my GP for a general psychology referral, and he linked me to a website for finding a new psychologist.  The website is was Psychology Today if you would like to find it on google.

I managed to recall what my doctor friend had said, and also selected ADHD under the issues section, I found a psychologist I thought could help me with my more immediate problem, who happened to also have Adult ADHD as a secondary specialisation, spoke to them briefly over the phone, once I was happy with the choice I got my GP to make the referral. I spent the first handful of my sessions trying to solve what was hardest in my life at the time, and as I started working through that I spoke to them about the other challenges I was and had been facing for as long as I could remember.

They suggested I might benefit from seeing a psychiatrist for diagnosis and medication because what I was facing was almost word for word what was typical with their patients with late diagnosis ADHD. Thanks to my health care professionals, and my doctor friend I was able to quite quickly find a psychiatrist with availability, and set up an appointment date although I did have to wait 3-4 months. Filled in some initial paperwork, and then sent in old school reports at their request.

After an assessment that lasted over an hour, mostly looking at if their was an alternate explanation (comorbidities that may cause changes to the dopaminergic system and mimic ADHD) they crossed the t's dotted the i's and submitted the diagnosis back to my GP. Some extra paperwork there so I didn't have to keep waiting months for appointments when I needed medication, and my GP was able to prescribe for me.

For me, the medication has changed a lot. I don't get stuck walking back and forth between rooms in my house, forgetting what I am doing, I have been able to build habits for the first time in my life and maintain them, I don't constantly feel overwhelmed by all the different things going on around me during the day, or so distracted that I forget to eat and take care of my physiological needs.

So, my best general advice is pretty simple. Book an appointment with your GP, and ask them to help you find the right person for what you need (or talk to your specialist if you already have one), research a little bit -if possible- for the right practitioner for your needs, try and look at their expertise, specialisations and experience if it is an option.

I'm more than happy to answer any follow up questions you might have,

Hoping this can help you on your journey to the answers you seek,

With all my warmth,

Resonar

[MissMuffet]

Welcome @meditate 

Firstly I want to say well done for reaching out and it sounds like you're pretty self aware which is the first big step in getting support.

Depression is an awful illness, and the way you've been (overwhelmed, paralysed, withdrawn) are all very common symptoms with depression. Are you getting any sort of professional help or treatment? The first step, if you haven't already would be to see your GP. You can then either start medication or psychology (both are usually recommended for severe depression, but ask your doctor). Severe depression, especially if it isn't caused by a triggering event usually doesn't go away by itself without intervention and it sounds like to me that this has been going on for a long time for you. It is however, treatable (or manageable) when you get the right support and recovery is possible. Sometimes undiagnosed ASD and ADHD can contribute to stress and anxiety and cause depression over the long term so it might be worth mentioning those to your GP too.

Other than practical advice, the best I can give is be kind to yourself. Depression is real, it's not your fault and you deserve to recover and live a mentally-well life. 

Best wishes!

[Shaz51]

Hello @MissMuffet , @meditate , @Resonar , @Melbcoffeesnob 

Thank you for all your comments 

@Jynx